7 Days

"If you had 24 hours to live just think Where would you go? What would you do? Who would you screw? And who would you wanna notify? Or would your ass deny that your ass about to die ?"

I thought of this song while I was reading a post on another blogger's blog (check him out!). I would like to open it up to 7 days. Where would you go in 7 days? What would you do in 7 days? Who would you screw in 7 days? Who would or wouldn't notify that you were going to die in 7 days? The overall concept is to give an outline of what all you would be doing with your last 7 days.

Wow, when I thought about this, it brought some tears to my eyes. Ummm, I would wanna spend some days with my brother his wife and my niece down in Maryland. Sharing stories about my mother, passing on information, last words etc... Then, as I feel time dwindling down, I would come back to Jersey and only wanna be held by my BF. If I was to die, I would like to die in his arms. This damn sprinkler system must of went off, there's water all on my face!

Weekend!

My weekend was full and packed! Let me start with Friday. I want to make sure I get every detail in...

Friday, being the last day of the work week for some, is just another day of the week for me. I woke up and took Shawn to work and came back and played around on the computer and did some light cleaning. Ya'll know I watched Passions! :-) By the way I am taking donations for "upgrade Shawn's Cablevision to DirecTV" fund, lol! Then, I had night service at church that I had to be at around 7:15. I left made my way home to get my change of clothes and loaned a friend some money for a rough spot she was going through. Made my way to pick up Shawn from work and proceeded to get dressed. Out the door I went headed to church. I was there when the rest of my crew was going out to eat. It was cool; I was giving God Glory while they were stuffing their faces! lol. Drove back to Woodbridge and picked up Reggie and came back to the house and chilled out till like 3, 3:30 till I crashed! I just couldn't stay away anymore.

Saturday, I was going to Maryland to surprise my niece with a birthday outing to wherever she wanted. She turned 5 on this past Monday, the 20th. I was supposed to be driving the U-Haul helping my friend (mentioned above) but help never showed so I was driving and moving her in.

SIGH

I did it because she needed help. Let me tell you, afterwards, I was sweatin like a dog and looked like I had just gone for a dip! My shiny glistening body, shirtless at the time, was working in overdrive. I was physically exhausted after. But still wanted to drive down. I got stuck in 4 hours worth of traffic! I had to take a nap at a rest stop in all of that sun! oh well, better than taking a nap around a pole, lol! I woke up and began traveling again; hit more traffic once in Delaware. sigh, only 3 disabled vehicles, which were all to the side of the road, unbelievable! Then once I got there, took her to play mini-golf, it started to rain. then bowling when it proceeded to thunderstorm. What can I say?!? I left headed back after eating some nice Hollywood Chicken :-) it was finger lickin’ good! Made it back safely, and met up at IHOP where everyone else went. went back to Shawn’s house and fell asleep!

Sunday, still tired. Missed both of my morning services. I went to go purchase a Bluetooth headset. got one on sale and had an additional $15 off! HOLLA Went to the last day of the conference that was going on all week and service was high. Got out and I had a flat. I was like GREAT! at least I was in a safe location. I found out that My front tires were almost bald due to a misalignment of my wheels. was down to the wires. I just thought to myself, "THANK GOD I WAS PROTECTED", I could of been on the highway when that tire decided to pop, which would of turned out to be very ugly. I was blessed, but still had to pay to get all new tires. all of my tires had some kind of damage on it. all different though lol that was the strange part, lol. After that trackstar and I chilled at the house. Tyson joined us after we left to get more chicken and came back. we relaxed then dropped Omar off at the train station to see him off to be our next American Idol!!! We rooting for you toots! I then took my ass to bed after my baby got home. it’s so nice to fall asleep next to him.

My weekend ladies, gents, and others! lol be cool and be safe!

Collage of Thoughts

Hmmmm lemme see, I would like to do one of those posts that has a few things included in it. Feeling like typing a lil bit today! Not too much I hope, lol! We'll see how it will pan out.

Well, I was dubbed a sexy thug recently and I must of cried my eyes out. While I do believe that I am sexy, I do not see myself as a thug. A message was sent to me, "you're too cute to be a thug"! I was like, "what does me being cute have over me being thug?" Thug is a behaviour and sometimes a physical attribute. Given: I am no thug, but if i wanted to be a thug I think I could be one.

On the current event corner, I have to go to court for a speeding ticket tomorrow. It was completely my fault and I just hope that this will not damper the length of my vacation! :-) I was going way too fast in a town that has nothing better to do than pull people over. I have warned people about this area many times, but failed to yield my own warning. The kicker was I was speeding trying to get to church! I thought I was covered in the blood, guess again lol. I still have to obey the laws of the land. Next time I will wait till I get through the town before I get a heavy foot!

I think the attention and popularity has died off and I have to say I am happy. It is no secret that I like attention but there is such a thing as too much attention. I think I got to that point. I'll stick to my nude beaches and keep my appearances on cam to a minimum!

My story is moving to DirecTv and I can't have satellites in my building and Shawn has cablevision! My time is running out, I need a plan! What to do what to do what to do???? I have been watching this soap since the 10th grade! that is like 6-7 years ago. I don't feel like counting the years so I used an approximate number.

My new car is about to get replaced if my mechanic cannot diagnose the problem that is causing my car to stall out in the rain. Now I am having issues with my alarm! It wants to go off whenever it wants to! Why is it that all of my cars seem to have issues with water? Sign, Next car is gonna be waterproof! lol

On another note, I got a phone call with a job offer. It is the first call I have received concerning a job, so there is a deal of significance. I was excited, still am excited! It was a cooks position paying $13/hr, full time position, 5 days/40 hours a week. I declined. I am still on my vacation and they would not compromise Sunday mornings. Oh well! NEXT!!!

I am refreshing myself on recipes that I should know, sanitation procedures, and different things as a cook/chef should come natural. I still don't consider myself a chef, experience brings that. My time will come.

I am physically out of shape. When I was in High School, I was able to do more physically. Run longer, lift more and was in general more physically defined. At this point I don't look like I am in bad shape. I actually don't look bad at all! I feel out of shape. I am fighting to stay within a weight range of 150-159. I recently rode a bike and at the end of the ride, I fell out! lol I laid on the bed and fell asleep! I was exhausted and extremely tired. It was only about 3 miles 4 at the most! I want to do more bike riding and more jogging and throw in some self resistant exercises. This should peak my body back to where it was. Since it was those things that gave me my body in the first place.

Well till the next time, my mind has been emptied of free flowing ideas. Buh Bye!

Watch Me, Look At Me!

Okay, I have developed this thing of wanting to be more revealing with my body. I have absolutely no problem being nude and do not care too much about whom is looking at me either. This stems from me desiring attention. I love attention and I do believe that it comes from a vain side of me that cries out to be noticed.

Recently, Shawn and I entered a chat room and started sharing a web cam. It was innocent at first but I got horny and it was hot so one thing started to lead to another and the next thing I knew there was a porn in the back ground, my clothes were off and Shawn and I were giving each other head! ON CAM, LOL!!! No complaints, by the way :-) hehehe... Moving on, the chat room had about 60-70 people in it. And shows icons of who all is watching your cam. There was an icon next to about all who was in that room! I got hornier and I started to grind on Shawn's dick. It was feeling good and was turning me on even more knowing that someone was watching me do this! The next thing I know I am bent over and my insides are being comforted! (That was a nice way to say that huh!)I took a look at me riding that dick and twisting and turning and I had an orgasm. Yes i said orgasm, i didn't cum, but that was all I needed! After that, all I wanted was my chest to be painted white, if you catch my drift! My wish was granted ;-)

I have been getting messages and im's asking when the show will go on. While I have no problem holding an encore ceremony, I don't think that Shawn feels anywhere near as comfortable as I do. I need a mode of letting my freak out! HELP!!!!

Two Shorts from Back in the Day

212
By: Daniel James

I wonder if we can make it;
take the world without it breaking us.
Overcome the way we started;
hoping that it won't part us.
Or will we separate,
if we did would my heart break?
I just don't know how I feel,
almost like I am the clicker on the "Wheel of Fortune" wheel;
touching every feeling and emotion...
but the wheel never stops!
I wanna stop it but I am afraid that it will land on love.
love, oh love! How did this happen?

A The
By: Daniel James

A thief of my words, the sun on my face.
The percussion of my heart, a current in my blood.
A tone in your voice, the notes of your sound,

fall fresh on a listening ear which cause me to fall to the ground.
The power you have, its not quite understood.
A simple explanation, please, if someone could!
The days have past, not one without thoughts of you.
A thought of a reality with you is opposite of blue.
The time clock ticks and tocks and goes on,
a thought, "is it with you I belong?"

A moment of confusion... there were so many thoughts that were rolling through my head. I didn't know why and had no explanation of the feelings that I felt. The only thing I could do at the time was take note of how I was feeling. I hoped that someday I might revisit these shorts and come to terms with the unclear and opaque reality I was dealing with. I have revisited and I still don't understand why! I've come to terms that there will be some emotions and feelings that have an unknown origin. Some that will never be understood. But I still try... Maybe again in a few years I'll understand. I'm so stubborn!

Knocked Out By My Faults!

Sigh, so here I am. Sitting here with Shawn having a personality discussion. My personality has been spotlighted. I don't know what to do! do I stay do I go, do I change or do I remain steadfast! It has been brought to my attention I have a few "character flaws".

The kinda of person that I am is one who tried to make everyone comfortable and I will put forth 100%, or very close if not more than 100%, effort to make sure people like me. I will even take it a step further, if I to see that you have a problem with me, I'll find out what it is. Then, I'll try ti fix it make amens so fourth and on. Problem in this scenario. It seems as though my "character flaws" were rendered by a group! So I asked, "what were they?" I do not think i was ready to hear what was said! That I act caddy, shady and dismissive. I said, "HUH"! It reminded me of this clip:

It caught me by left field that I was like wow! I really wanted to make an attempt to change despite the devastating blow. I do believe I was being denied the chance. It has me a lil low even though I am trying not to show it. Should I try to fix this, or should I break tradition and leave things things as they are? I understand that everyone won't like the charming fuzzy as I like to be known as but why can't I try to be liked by everyone?

Mixed Emotions

My long awaited departure from my job has finally come. YaY? No YaY? I really would've thought that today would be a happy day, a cheerful day even! I woke up and I have a feeling of blah. Its very similar to a dreadful feeling or a bad feeling of anticipation (like the feeling you get when you are getting ready to get a beating from daddy) lol!

I am thinking back onto previous jobs and seeing my downfalls. What made me hate the jobs. What made me leave them? What made me not want to go back? I want to make the correct next job choice based upon these answers. Yes that's right I am quitting my job without having one in line before. I am okay with that because I have fallout plans and backup plans up the whazoo. I WILL NOT FALL ON MY FACE! I don't like falling, lol... I had a plan of going into teaching, a cooking teacher to be more specific. I would need to go back to college for another 4 years. There might be a loophole in there somewhere but I will into that more on my extended vacation. Before I go ahead and spend money and time going to school for another 4 years I would like to know if I would even like teaching. So, I venture into the world of substitute teaching. If I don't like it I saved myself money and time, if I do then I found a career!

On a side note, somebody asked me how many people I send my "Word 4 Today" to and I honestly didn't know. I went back and counted the number of recipients and it totaled 78! I was shocked that 78 people are inspired my my word every morning. I am planning on doing a weekend email of an extended "Word 4 Today" The time is finally here for the email! and if all goes well, it may turn into a weekday thing as well!

Oh I know I am probably the last person that needs to talk about weight, but I gained 12-14 lbs back in the Feb-March period. I don't know how or where but it pasted itself on me somewhere. I have changed my diet around and saw some results but they were temporary. I am now happy to say I am 3 pounds away from where I used to be, 155lbs!

Well its about time that I go start my last day of work, Y'all wish me luck!

Cupcake

I wanna make a shoutout to my baby cupcake! He has been there for me and i just wanna be the icing on him! I love you Shawn, aka Cupcake!

Church Folks, A Social Class?

I was sitting in the choir stand at church. I was thinking to myself about my behavior and the behavior of other church people while they are in church. After much thought, I have come to the realization that many people who call themselves christians tent to place themselves on pedestals! I fell victim to this as well! Let me explain this...

There are the church people that come to church to show off their money. You have the people that see what kind of hand out they can get (not talkin about the spirit either)! I can't forget the ones that come to sit and cause trouble with their backbiting and gossip! Oh what about the phony people that come to tell you one thing and as soon as you turn around they're doing exactly what they told you not to do! HYPOCRITES! The bosses of the church, you know the ones that really have NO AUTHORITY whatsoever, are the ones I roll my eyes at!

I really place myself in the gossip corner. Is it gossip if it is the truth? If it isn't I take it back lol! Seriously though I think you can separate the church from everyone else because I truly believe that they/we think believe they/we are better than everyone else because we have Jesus.

Can someone shed their opinion and let me know how you feel about this?

Anyone Can Cook!

I guess I have been feeling that maybe I couldn't handle myself in the kitchen the way I should. I haven't had much chance to shine like I want. I cont have opportunities to be creative. I have been cooking since I was in the 5th Grade and it seems as though I am taking a back burner instead of being front and center where all the attention is. I like attention!

In the Pixar movie, Ratatouille, there were multiple moments of inspiration and enlightenment that just seemed to slap me in the face. One of the most important concepts and ideals put forth in the movie is "anyone can cook"! Meaning that maybe everyone may not be an artist, but an artist can come from anywhere. I was examining myself throughout the whole movie and I must say there were many things in the movie I needed to hear. I am encouraged to be me and more original. While I will continue with my goal of being a cooking teacher, I will also endeavor on making a name for myself. I doubt that I will be the next Escoffier or an established chef in La Caesar Ritz Hotels, but who knows? I could end up better than them. All I have to do is try! This is what I haven't been doing, TRYING!!!

Moving on with business and onto another note, most of my close friends are aware that I am in search of a new place of employment. I am reaching out to the couples in relationships right now; does work schedule affect your relationships? I mean currently I work 6-3 and Shawn works 9-5. We both work Monday - Friday. My field doesn't exactly like to give weekends off lol. When I change jobs most likely it will be a night job with few, if any, weekends off. I need to know how ya'll deal with it. Please shoot me some suggestions!

So I plan on giving myself a vacation. I wish to set myself up with $2000 and place it on the side. This will cover my monthly expenses for two months, as well as gas money and $500 spending money. (I've worked on a budget before, I am sure this will be piece of cake!) I intend on taking the remainder of the summer off once I reach my goal of $2000. I need to relax and take some time for myself. If I can save up another G then maybe I will go on a cruise! I gotta hustle though... lol!