Blessing or Carelessness?

I just experienced a great loss. It was in the amount of $1400. I was beside myself. Let me explain why. Some of you know that I have been trying to get a replacement car for some time now. Not long but long enough for me. On yesterday, I finally got an approval that I can work with so far as financing this car.

::YaY::

I Purchased the policy for my car insurance and was mostly ready to go to get my new car! Today I wake up a lil late and start to running around and am in a REAL RUSH. I get outta my baby's apartment (HEY SHAWN) and get to Newark Penn Station. I realize that I don't have my $1400 I need for my down payment! It was like one of those moments that you wish wasn't true. I immediately emptied all of my pockets in search of this money. Couldn't find it. After searching for about an hour, calling and reporting a lost envelope and driving around looking for it, I called out of work. I was depressed and I knew somebody was gonna push a button and that was going to be all she wrote! I fell asleep unable to sustain one emotion for longer than several seconds. I would wanna cry but only one tear would come out. I wanted to pout (believe me I am a pouter), but I couldn't. WHY? I fell asleep with Shawn consoling me. He told me everything was going to be OK. I was like hell nah! I paid for a policy that I can't use, I don't have money for a car that I worked so hard to finance and lastly I'm too pissed to go to work!

::MOVING ON::

I fell asleep and woke up several upon several times within 2 hours. Each dream had the same message, and it was that I was going to find the money here in the house and not on the streets of Newark where it will be very unlikely that somebody will return it. In the dreams I found it in my coat, various different pockets, many different locations in the house, and lastly on my leg! That was the weirdest one but I checked and lo and behold there it is! at the bottom of my pant leg.

The title of this post entitled Blessing or Carelessness. I don't care which one it is or how anyone views it, I got my money for my new car!

::HOLLLAAAA::

Technical Difficulties...

Ok the subject that I wanted to talk about on video I can't do. I got ready to do the video and lo and behold My camera is missing! So I have to do the video post later on this week when I get my webcam back...

Question: Why is it that some people need to control their lover or people in general?

I'm going to say that a couple who I know, I'll name them Dee and Cee, are a new couple and are going through a lil something. Dee is 39 years old and seems to like younger guys. the guy that he just started to date is Cee and he is 18 years old. There is an obvious power struggle and a control issue. Dee, it seems like to me, always as to have the last word. Has to throw his dominance around. Cee is very book-smart and isn't street smart. He gets walked on all the time. It is SOOO plain to see that Dee Takes advantage of him and Cee doesn't know how to react to it. Just on tonight he wanted to come by Shawn's place and play video games. Dee said, "go if you want" "I don't know if I'm gonna be home when you get through". I'm hearing this and I say what the hell! Dee couldn't be considerate and call before he leaves or swing by and pick him up before he goes out? well he's the reply to that, "I'm not going that way". I heard that and all I could do is:

::EXHALE::

The thing is that I like Cee more than I like Dee. I've known Dee for 2 years. I want, for some reason, to side with Cee. He seems like he is the one that is going to be a victim of a upcoming relationship. Its going way too fast and way to quickly. I'm so up in the air I can't finish this post! How do you hang around all of this foolishness?

I Pose a Question

Ok I'm preparing a video post and I need to know a few things. I have two ideas for this post.

1. Talk about a few things that is on my mind. Some of which are amusing and others well You will see eventually...
2. You pick what you want me to talk about. This is always good, like a reader's choice!

I also have a question or two. I have seen video posts that are like 15+ minutes long! What is an acceptable length for a video post? Since I am absent minded and forgetful at times, is it ok to have a list of topics in front of me while I speak?

Let me know so I can do this video correctly!

Just a Vent...

Why is it that some people sell others short of what they are capable of and others give people more than what they are actually worth? Within the past week, on more than one occasion, I was told that I was doing something that I had no knowledge of. I was polite and quick to tell them otherwise. Just because of one's age, speaking of mine in particular (21), I'm not supposed to know much. WRONG! My brown skin gives a message that I don't know how to converse with other races (I can't believe I heard this with my own two ears!) I would also like to know Why I am often generalized in a group that I do not belong to and I am often thrown into stereotypes? I come to tell everyone that is reading I break a lot of molds and If you wish to see in person, I don't have a problem showing you!

I found out today, at work, that a lady that does absolutely nothing gets paid a full dollar more than I do! WTF! Did I let it slide? Yes :-/ But It made me start to place things into perspective. I'm not going to be given anything unless I work for it and earn it. Even after that, it places me into the running with a host of competitors! For the amount I get paid right now, I'm not complaining because it is paying my bills and leaving me with spending money. Not to mention money to place away for saving. That is only because my expenses are not high. Why do people think they can take advantage of others and get away with it. I'm going to use this Job for everything that it is worth and get my vacation time. Once Summer is over I plan on making at least 10,000 more per year. That's it! I'm worth it!

Intermission: Free rides for students on NJTRANSIT

I start class today. Its a Miracle! Lets explain...

1, I was registered and then dropped for all of my classes for an unknown outstanding bill!

2, Financial Aid did not approve a student loan to cover previous balance as well as pay for the upcoming tuition. After Much talking and my own 1st conversation with God, the Director of Financial Aid approved everything so I can go ahead and begin the re-registration process

3, All my classes are full on the last day of late registration! OMG I'm not going to graduate! I asked is there any other way around this? A student Counselor advised me that if there is anyway to get in, I would have to speak with deans and directors of various departments. I was told that they have sent over 100 students to the deans with no success. I was like, "God this is where you come in!" At the end of the day I spoke to over 15 people (Deans, directors, Secretaries) and I am registered for every single class!

4, I have over $600 at the student bookstore to use at my leisure! I've never been approved for financial aid to cover my books.

5, 2 days later I get a nice fat check from the college with enough money to either repair my car or replace the car.

I'm yet checking stuff off of my new years list already! I purchased me some new dress shoes and sneakers and have plans on replacing my wardrobe. Completely (except for the suits I paid over $200 for :-D)

Well I have talked enough for one day, don't forget to read my other post I did like 45 min ago! LoL

Daniel

Just something to get some things out of the way. I was sent this in an email and I thought It would be nice to post it to the Blog. Sorry I haven't been online to post in a little while but I'm back and I'm posting 2 posts, WHAT?!? What ya'll have to say about that one? Nothing to spectacular or revealing in this post but whatever, Tell me if anything surprises you.

1. FIRST NAME? Daniel
2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? After Daniel in the Bible. Its in the Old Testament, If you need directions please ask!
3. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? Last Week, I don't wanna get into it!
4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Yes, when I take my time
5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Boar's Head Ham
6. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Nope
7. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOURSELF? Uhhh... yea!
8. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? I have a Prayer Book of personal conversations to God and I have a blog (sort of a online journal, to me anyways)
9. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Most definitely.
10. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Sure do!
11. WOULD YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMP? I don't think I'd ever go through with it but the desire is there.
12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Honey Nut Cherios
13. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Dress shoes, yes, sneakers boots and other forms of footwear no!
14. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Yes I THINK I'm strong
15. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? Toss up between Vanilla and Strawberry
16. SHOE SIZE? 11.5/12/12.5 (It honestly keeps growing and shrinking, IDK why!)
17 RED OR PINK? Red
18. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOU?I'm sort of a pushover. I am too nice and very gullible. Was I supposed to limit this to one?
19. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? RIGHT NOW? My Mom. My co-pilot went on to Glory :-)
20. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? Yea, sure why not...
21. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Grey Sweats and black Timberland Boots
22. LAST THING YOU ATE? Macaroni & Cheese, Chicken Scampi, Broccoli, and Spanish rice
23. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Nothing, the last thing I listened to was Right Now by Smokie Norful
24. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Blue
25. FAVORITE SMELL(s)? Food, in general, as it cooks or after it has been cooked.
26. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My cousin David
27. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO? The First thing they say.
28. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Yea! I don't have any thing Bad to say about him. Great Guy...
29. FAVORITE DRINK? Anything with strawberries in it!
30. FAVORITE SPORT? If I have to pick I'll say tennis
31. EYE COLOR? Brown
32. HAT SIZE? 7 3/4
33. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No
34. FAVORITE FOOD? Pasta (use your imagination and I'll probably like it!
35. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDING? Both
36. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED AT THE MOVIES? A Night at the Museum
37. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? 2 shades of gray and black on a 3 button Tee
38. HUGS OR KISSES? Hug, don't want nobody's rusty grill all up on me!
39. FAVORITE DESSERT? Strawberry Banana Sundae
40 Your favorite animal? Chameleon
41. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? I Don't understand!
42. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? None, I need to dive into this book called Conversations with God. I been sayin I wanted to read it and now I have the book and haven't lifted a finger. I bow my head in shame!
43. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? I don't have one
44. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Heroes
45. FAVORITE SOUNDS? Running water (a river suffices) and slow worship driving gospel songs
46. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Neither
47. THE FURTHEST YOU'VE BEEN FROM HOME? Florida
48. WHAT'S YOUR SPECIAL TALENT? Cooking and being a universal inspirer.
49. WHEN AND WHERE WERE YOU BORN? April 2, 1985 in Rahway, NJ.

hmmm...

I'm sitting here at work and I gotta say that this week has been very interesting. Lets give a breakdown of what happened. I Get a phone call from my ex that turns into this "why don't I call anymore" and "we can't be friends?" and lets not forget "why don't we chill anymore?

::exhale::

Ex before him hits me up on the day after. This happens innocently. We saw each other online and didn't realize who each other was. We exchanged pics and he remembered first and I was left with "uhhh who is this". Then after closely examining pictures and looking at the info he gave me prior to this happening, I remembered. Who is next?

I have also had a realization at my current job and a realization for self value. I was told to clean a beef shank and was trimming it very good. Then comes in the boss and says, "Why you throwing away ALL of the fat? That's flavor right there!" Granted that fat adds some taste to the meat but the amount that he was telling me to leave was utterly disgusting! I was like whatever. I thought and thought on this and stated to myself, I'm better than this place. I was emailing Bougie and talking about this and he encouraged me to never sell myself short on my value. I, not at that exact moment but eventually, believed him! I'm going to start looking for a new job to start later on in the year maybe mid summer or fall's beginning. For those of you that don't know I am a up and coming cook with chef capabilities.

::smile::

I'll be obtaining my degree in Culinary Arts in May of 2007! Everyone hoops and hollas at this point! Its okay go ahead... I'll pause so you get it out of your system.

Okay times up!

I'm finally going to try again to repair my car today and I'll let you know how that goes...

until later, a video post is coming :-)

A Shawn and Daniel Christmas

WOW, I can't believe that another year has come and gone! It doesn't seem like the year has been a great one but guess what I'M STILL HERE! Just making mention to God and Giving him Thanks just for being God!

On the 16th of December, Shawn and I had a Party!!! It was our gift to all of our friends for Christmas! Why not feed them well, provide them with a place to converse and enjoy everyone's company, and see all the reactions when they see how much food I prepared solely by myself! Oh yea it was such a fun day! Lets dive right into it...

Appetizers

Open Faced Club Sandwiches- Dressing, Cole-slaw, with a choice of salami, ham, or turkey with Swiss cheese. Each topped with tomato.
Vegetable Platter- Celery, Carrots, and Broccoli
Fruit Platter- Kiwi, Grapes, Apples, Pineapples, and Strawberries

Entree's

Meats included Buffalo Chicken, Fried Chicken, and Asian BBQ Ham

Vegetables included Mixed Vegetables, Collard Greens, and String Beans

Starches included Mac&Cheese, Baked Ziti, and White Rice

Desserts

Sweet Potato Pie, Decorated Butter Cream Cake, Strawberry Shortcake, and Banana Pudding


I do believe that I out did myself, and I did all the cooking on the day of the party! I did want to finish earlier but what can I say, STUFF HAPPENS!!! There was Music Playing, topic discussion, and some were dancing at moments of the evening/night/morning! Yea that's right, the party didn't end until Sunday morning at around 5:30am!

Celebrity appearances included of course the hosts, The Dreamer ShawnQt, The ever wondering boy Fuzzy, Always progressing LegendofO, from his distorted world Jay, The very dapper Dapper D, Aspiring Ty, The Queer Kid of Color, and a host of friends and friends of friends!

Parties can get out of control, and as Some of you already know, this party went a lil south but everyone still enjoyed themselves! There was some raunchiness and it got unusual but it was still tasteful! Let me show you what I mean...

I'm just glad that everyone had a great time and I can't wait until the next party gets here! What kind of party will it be? What will I cook? Stay tuned, and next time can we not delete the evites? Gee Jolly Wilkers!!!

Questions Answered

I apologize for taking longer than expected with posting the answers. Internet problems... ANYHOO, I'm going to be answering and commenting in order to the comments left in the previous post. Here are the answers to the few questions that were asked:

1. Why can't you say the word death? I can say the word death, but there are times where I don't wish to say it. It is so very physically final and it does scare me.

2. As a proper religious boy, why can't you simply see it as another stage of your life? To be know and to believe are different things. People know that death is another stage in life but I have trouble believing whether or not it is the final stage.

As for passing in my sleep, that sounds like the way to go!

I understand that everyone gets a lifetime, but is it wrong to want more than a lifetime?

3. What side of the bed do you sleep? I tend to sleep on the right side of the bed.

4. What's your favorite candy? I really don't have a favorite, but if I had to pick one I would probably pick Werther's Original!

5 and 6. Would you change your name if you could? If so, what would it be? I would change my name around to Tyrone Daniel James instead of Daniel Tyrone James

7. Do you believe in love at first sight? I do believe in love at first sight. It happened with my brother! Cool HuH!

8. When did you get saved? I don't have a definite answer but would say around 8 or 9. That alter call bothered me too much!

9 and 10. Can you sing? Can you dance? I have a choir voice and I cannot dance well, despite how much I say I can!

11. What is your specialty dish? I don't have a specialty dish, maybe I should try to come up with one! Something with my signature on it!

Ladynay you are 2 handfuls! Maybe later in January LoL

12. What exactly do you mean by Ultimate Ending? I meant death when I said "ultimate ending"

13. Why is ur nickname Fuzzy again? My nickname is Fuzzy because of the soft but yet fuzzy rear end that I have! LOL

14. Do you like chocolate? I love Chocolate but it doesn't like me! White chocolate doesn't bother me. Any other chocolate it seems like my body reacts to it. IDK why!

15. What will you cook at my wedding? I can cook anything and everything you want me to cook at your wedding. Not being pompous, but I really can! And I already said that I can't dance......Well! :-D

16. If you had the choice to do anything without restrictions or negative ramifications, what would it be? If it could be supernatural, I would go back in time and and try to save my mother's life somehow. If it is in the natural, I would transfer all of Bill Gates money to my checking account!

17. What is your biggest sexual fantasy? I would love to be in complete sexual ecstasy for 24 hours and it would not matter how many people participated!

18. You mention previously that you tried to stop messing with guys when your mom passed. What are you feelings on your sexuality now? I am very happy with the way that I am living, while I am in a homosexual state. As for now I am not confused, and I hope it stays like that! Confusion complicates everything!

19. Can you speak in tongues? I'm not going to say I can't but it seems as though I do not have that gift.

20. How did you feel/react the first time you read Shawn's blog and learned so much about him in one sitting? I let him have his privacy when I learned of his blog. I let him have his world. Once invited to share in his creativity, I saw that he is a very special person that has a voice with much to say with it. I was amazed, and still am being amazed when I view his creativeness!

21. If you were a drug dealer what drug would you push? Tainted water!

22. If you had to get a prosthetic arm, would you get one that was the same color as you, or would you enjoy being a different shade? I would get one that was a different shade. It makes it easier to show my handicap and get handouts!

23. Your a prostitute. Write a advertisement for the yellowbook. OMG "Sexy Stud for hire! Guaranteed to have you coming back for more every time! Anything you would like to do, your imagination is the limit!"

24. How old do you think is old? Possibly starting at the late fifties and early sixties.

25. How do you feel about celebrating Kwanzaa? I'm not exactly sure what kwanzaa is! Let me look it up... (5 min later) After research, I would not celebrate kwanzaa. The Founder thinks that Christianity is a white religion and that Jesus was psychotic! FOOLISHNESS in my opinion.

26. Do you try to walk on water like Peter when no on is watching? LoL no!

I wanted people to be serious AND outrageous. I wanted people to pry into my life whether it be personal or not. I would of answered all questions if it incriminated me or not.

SHAWN AND A HAD A PARTY, STAY TUNED!

I need a Vacation!

It has been such a long time since I put everything down and took time for me. Time for me to relax. How do I relax or find time to pull away from things that are important for living, a.k.a. a job! I need to sit back take life in before it passes me by. I NEED A VACATION!!!

Lately, I have been having thoughts about the ultimate ending. It scares the crap out of me. What will it feel like? How will it come? The question nobody knows the answer to, when will it happen? It gets to the point of me loosing myself in thought about what is to come. It gives me a cold feeling that goes so deep it causes me to sweat and become anxious. I just need to calm down and stop worrying about things I can't control. I often wonder why a 21 year old thinks about these things!

Moving on... I'm tired of thinking about situations about my job. Between the backstabber and the gay co-worker, I've got to be on my toes! I just wake up everyday and go to work and do what I have to do. If this continues, they better watch out because I'm going to strike back with a vengeance.

>:-O

I have seen other bloggers extend the opportunity for readers to ask them questions. I think I would like to give that a try.

Any question that you think you might want to ask Fuzzy, you go ahead!

This is open to anonymous readers as well.

Get to know Fuzzy Part 2

Guess what Bloggers? I have another quiz!!! Its one to figure out what you wouldn't get me for Christmas and what you would get me. Plus added bonus, you see a little bit more of me and what I like and dislike. I'll clarify the answers on the next post.

::TAKE MY QUIZ NOW::

Enter your blog name and your e-mail address. Type a bogus one if you don't wish to enter your own. It tells you the answers as you select them. Don't forget to post your scores. Good luck!!!

Also don't forget to read An Update! I read it over and over and get excited! Well, I hope you like it...