Stop the Presses! I'm Single!
Over the past 10 years, since High School years, I've been in a relationship most of the time. There hasn't been too long of time that has gone by before I started entertaining the next Fuzzy's BF. This year is no different! As I've grown and matured, while experiencing many things, I can better weed out things I don't need in a mate. Yes, I AM looking, I just haven't found a ripe peach in the field yet!
I broke up with Gabe in January. By the time April came along I was seeing Darrius. Darrius just turned 33 when I met him in March at one of my parties. He was a guest brought along against his will by another guest. He didn't enjoy himself and on his exit I managed to get a rise outta him. We exchanged info and I began to text him. Before long, we were getting to know each other and getting acquainted. I shared my status with him and while initially alarmed, he didn't seem to have a problem. I was infatuated, he was sexy, big dick, fat ass, fun, competitive and sorta charming even! What I didn't see was his Nigga-ism. This guy was GHETTO! Never has any money, always needs a ride, never wants to travel and always wants to stay home. Party of it was because he didn't have a job! He was getting unemployment checks living from check to check. My biggest issue was how you gonna be poppin mollys, getting turned up, and going here and there but when I ask you to chill we gotta stay home, at YOUR house? Personally, I feel that he couldn't handle my positive status and was looking for me to leave him alone. All of that really killed my vibe, so I had to let him go!
Enter Shon! He's cute, self employed with a catering business, has aspirations and dreams. Always has money, words cooperative hours to my work hours and is versatile. Relationships aren't about sex but you're a fool if you don't consider sex before getting into a relationship! Anyway, my hangup with him is communication. He's always late. He never answers the phone. He's slow to respond to a text at all times of day, and seems like a shifty guy. That and he lives in New Brunswick. Its not far, but when you wanna chill it's definitely not around the corner. I feel like he wasn't interested in me when he brought a date to a beach outing I organized. I just read the writing on the wall and had to let him go too!
Enter Shawn! Sexy, Jamaican, tall, youthful, driven, lives relatively close (15-20 mins away), and I think he's even vers! Proper speaking guy, educated with a job, car and apartment. That's the good. The bad is still yet to unfold. This is the most recent meet and though a lil excited, I have my guard set extremely high. I'm not tryin to get my hopes up and have them crashing down again. I already know he may be a mommas boy, cool by me. If my moms was still around I'd be callin her everyday too! He tends to disappear and forget he has a phone at times. I'm not a stalker or anything, but you get 2 calls and 2 texts per day before I stop reaching out. He tends to hit me back whenever, not a fan of that but it could just be bad timing on my part. Time will tell.
Here's the tea with me. I'm a single man, who many may consider very sexy, cute and handsome. In 2013, I make my own money, drive my own car (a nice 2005 VW GTI), have my own apartment, credit isn't that bad, graduated college, have goals dreams and ambitions, all of which make me nicely marketable. Plus I'm a freakin church boy with ol' skool southern influenced upbringing! Many have said I'm a great catch. Where are the mitts?
The down side, I'm HIV positive. As much as people say its 2013 awareness is up and you can be careful and this and that, guys still are fearful of HIV. Men have the wrong information about the virus and they judge and make stereotypes about us and don't even give us a chance. So, I have to strategically plan when I disclose this information. It's always an awkward and uncomfortable conversation and I always go into the talk prepared to be hit, cursed out, let down and disappointed. This is my life, and because an idiot asshole decided he wanted to poke holes in condoms and infect people now I have to deal with this. The down side keeps sloping! I live with my ex. We broke up yes, however we are business partners for my sex party that I have been throwing for over two years. He is a financial help to the apartment and a partner to my party and it makes sense to keep him around. To someone who is trying to date me, their perception is quite different.
I'm single and I don't know for how long. It's not by choice, it's by happenstance! I hope this changes soon, Summer is ending and I would love to end the summer right and enjoy the beautiful autumn colors with someone.
Just Keep Wondering...
0 thoughts:
Post a Comment