I have been single for maybe two months now. I don't know exactly when, but I know it happened in May. Ever since then I have been less than proud of my actions. I haven't exactly been a one man guy, broadly speaking! I could try to blame it on all this free time that I have, but I could blame myself. I could blame it on the heat, but I could always bring the blame back to me. I can blame it on the internet, but I'm the one that's using the internet so It would still be my fault. Yeah, its been fun, can't say it hasn't! My goodness, much fun! I've done some explorations and have discovered more about myself, sexually speaking, and I think to know one's self in the sexual is only coming more into one's own identity. As this short time period passed by, I grew more and more blah to the whole spontaneous/repetitive/random sex. I had to admit this to myself, and I'm glad I did so before someone else told me. The next thing to do is create a solution to the problem. I think I will be more reserved and more selective.
Something else happened. I went to Dave & Dante's place for Dante's 21st Birthday Party. It was cute and I enjoyed myself. I was more engaging than I thought I would be. I mean, I was around all new people and I would usually sit there and listen to all of the conversation and comment when I was directly questioned or included. I wanted to be engaging and not the Fuzzy that would be quiet and in the back ground! At the end of the party, we played a game of strip uno, that amazingly was kept very simple. (I think my game of strip uno was way better) Everybody knows the reason my nickname is Fuzzy is because I'm hairy! Yea, I got comments on it, some that I dismissed and some that were acceptable. Water off my back, lol! However when the shirt came off, someone made a comment on my "4 pack"! I was hurt... This was the point where I make up my mind to get my body right! I've had a 6-pack since I've been in the 10th grade. granted that was about 8 or 9 years ago but I mean really? A 4 pack? My mind sunk into a brief mind depression! My body is walking away, I gotta go catch it! The first pic was about 1 year and change ago, the next pic was taken minutes ago. I feel so bad now!
The next day, Dave fixed my breaks, and pointed out a few things on my car that needed attention. I just wanna take the time out to tell him specifically, THANK YOU! I'm not mechanically inclined and every time I have an issue with my car I call him up and he gives me answers. He does the light and sometimes medium maintenance on the car too! Again, Thank you! Afterwards, we meet up at his house and well lay around in the air condition all day. It was kind of hot and I have an attic apartment and I didn't feel like being a human rotisserie! So, I was there on the couch, laying down, just observing Dave and Dante's interactions. My mind drifted back to when I was with Shawn. How we used to be like them: loving, playful, in love! I missed it!
Not so far in the past, just this morning as a matter of fact, I told someone I didn't want to be in a relationship. I didn't want to be tied down. I didn't want to have to answer to them. I didn't want to deal with the finance that goes along with being in a relationship. I didn't want to further divide my time to include my relationship. Right now isn't for me. I got a flashback to how happy I was and I gotta say that I'm not so sure anymore! I'm used to having a million and one things going on at one time. What's one more thing? There's so much to consider before I begin to slowly ease myself into another relationship. I wont rush, nor will I be rushed into a relationship. There will be guidelines set. There will not be a meet and 2 days later I got a ring on it! Not gonna fly like that anymore! I guess, like everyone, I want to be loved and I want someone to love!
Do you remember the blogger crush I had? Well I finally told her who I was! She was surprised, and her reaction was a favorable one. Maybe this newly found confidence will help me out in the future! Maybe she can help me!
15 thoughts:
Don't be depressed Fuzzy, some people don't even have a half pack. You may not be as defined as before but you aren't that far off by looking at the pictures. With your built, you can probably be back to pic 1 in a week. You make me sick. LOL
DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE BODY...I AM SURE A FEW WEEKS YOU WOULD BACK TO YOUR OLD SELF IN NO TIME...
:( i just at 3pcs of fried chicken!
nic pics...but u know u got to
work at gettin ur 6 back....
You are just fine. I am on the heavier side and would give my left and right foot to have a body like yours........
"I wont rush, nor will I be rushed into a relationship. There will be guidelines set. There will not be a meet and 2 days later I got a ring on it! Not gonna fly like that anymore! I guess, like everyone, I want to be loved and I want someone to love!"
Great Revelation! I think we have forgotten what it means to date.
You have nothing to be upset about. Punks are the most superficial creatures on the planet. F**K em. You got a hella nice body and damnit the hair is sexy too. Pat yourself on the back and acknowledge your worth my dude. And there is nothing wrong with being selective on the fellas...I encourage it. Enjoy chillin with Fuzzy!
Just a little self discipline, and you will be the man you want to be physically.
As far as love goes . . .take your time. Don't rush. It'll come to you.
Bodies change, people change. Love me just for me. Good post. I feeling the same about my body, but too lazy to do anything about it. I the I need a Wii fit. lol.
Fuzzy bear your body still looks great! i had to bite my lip when i seen both! is the 1st one cropped?...just wondering if something else was cut out that picture...lmao!
i would like to be loved too but i know im scared of commitment.
enjoy you, and continue to have fun you have come a long way from where you use to be. :)
Keep your head up you will get your six pack back again. In time you will find the right person to start a relationship with.
Wait a minute! You should not be in the least bit upset about your body in fact you have a very sexy body, of course only you see it fully nude so maybe the picture doen't tell all, but I am willing to bet it's nice all over.
Four pak, six pack as long as you are healthy it doesn't much matter, try carrying around this Heineken Barrel there isn't anything sexy about it, but as long as I am healthy I won't complain, besides if someone loves you they will take all of you.
Okay so the relationship thing isn't working out, no sweat off your balls keep doing your thing, when the time comes your Prince will appear less of course it is a Princess you desire, either way Fuzzy is gonna find love. I personally don't think you have actually gotton over Shaun or is that Shawn.
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Hey Fuzzy, I'm new here but let me add my opinion. As long as you are happy with yourself, then f*** all else. Don't let other people's criticism be your motivation for change. As long as Fuzzy loves Fuzzy the world is fine...with those sexy ass lips.
You're body looks fine. After a couple weeks in the gym and a shave it'll look like new again. The people who chastised you are prolly prototypical, shallow gays with nothing of substance to show for themselves.
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