I Will Lift My Head

Why should I be bound? Why should I choose to let things get me down? I know that my Lord and Saviour came into my life and turned so many things around for me. Turned difficult situations into easy ones, on many occasion lifted my head from the ground, and not to mention how he constantly places me onto a solid standing place. Yet I have the nerve to complain when something goes wrong.

::EXHALE::

I go through many things in life. Who doesn't? But it seems as though I complain when everything happens. It was brought to my attention that whenever, in specific, I go through a time I always end up on top. This person told me that he no longer worries about me and my bad happenstance because God always makes a way for me to come out on top! he always sees me through my storms. Then another friend went on to say I want the favor you have with God cause he's always working it out.

Even as I type this post on my cell phone I'm listening to an instrumental of Pastor Donnie McClurkin "Stand" and I'm encouraged that after I've done all that I can do and it doesn't work to still stand and to wait on the Lord to see me through.



My faith is constantly being tested through little things and I can't help but wonder if this is happening to be to prepare me for something else that well really bring me to my knees! I'm going to try my hardest best to learn from my trials now and apply my patience to my later experiences. After all I've only been through light rain with a lil lightning and thunder. The storm is still yet to come.

What is next to come...

My Bedtime Body Language

One day last year, around the November December 2005 period, I found this cool survey that had to do with your bedtime body language. It was one of those stupid quizzes but the results made sense! I first got one result but then decided to go back and take the quiz multiple times to see the other answers. Highlighted in Bold Blue will be the things that can be applied to my personality.

On Your Stomach
Studs who sleep on their stomachs have passion and energy. Your a hands on guy who tends to be punctual and successful. One caveat: Your propensity to hog the bed space with your sprawling position suggests you might be a tad controlling.

Full Fetal
You are vulnerable and sensitive. After all, your guarding your heart. You might cling to a pillow for security. As such, you need assurance that your feelings are reciprocated before you give yourself completely in a relationship.

Semi-Fetal
You are probably mild-mannered and rational. Since this semi-fetal sleeper takes up a minimal amount of space, he tends to be a giving lover. Also, he's way too sensible to play -- or stand for -- mind games.

On Your Back
You are confident and may have a vain streak. Of all the positions, this one exposes the most skin. You crave being the center of attention. The good news: Your open and eager to embrace new experiences and challenges -- in and out of bed.

Its weird because I sleep in all of these positions and in no particular order. They all have something to say about me and my characteristics. Maybe I should get a professional photographer to change those photos above with me! That would be HOT! I believe that most people sleep in one particular position or at the most two, but I sleep in like everyone imaginable! Well I benefit from all areas of it.

Opinions?

I Can't Believe This Happened!

I was walking along the boardwalk at an amusement park with two friends. We were having fun, the time of our lives if you must, talking about just about anything and laughing about everything that was said. Taking in the view of the beautiful ocean line and the extravagant beach, we walk to an arcade to spend our money for prizes that wouldn't be worth half as much!

We get to the arcade and we walk around we find a game in which you roll a ball down a little alley and try to make it into a hole. You know the ones that give you a certain amount of balls and you roll them down the alley in efforts to get the highest score. That being said, my two other friends took the liberty to go ahead of me. I was fine with it though, it seemed like. They sucked and didn't make a single point! My turn comes up and I make the highest scoring hole on the game! I was mad proud of myself, with the jumping and finger pointing and gloating. Leave it to me to be the best at something. This is what the game looks like:

I was more shocked at what happened next. Instead of tickets coming out of the machine, cash came out! In five and ten dollar increments. I was "forced" to play more rounds to see how much money that I could win. I think I won about 5 G's playing that game. I was feeling it too LOL. The machine ran out of money and left us disappointed, so we left on our way with our prize money that I agreed to split three ways.

I was a little unsatisfied and wanted more! We turned around and this toddler sized girl was now playing the game. We waited patiently for the girl to lose and get off the game. When she did I returned and to find out that they had filled the machine with money again. I was like YESSS! I was rolling them balls down that ol'e alley and was scoring big each time. Then a employee came over and did something to the machine and the next time I played and scored I got a voucher for a pound cake! I was like what's this? I looked up and there was a glass display full of cakes and pastries LOL! I wanted the cash and not the cake, so we left the arcade yet again but with about 15 G's to split this time.

I was disturbed about that pound cake voucher LOL. I think I should of went back and gotten that cake. I worked up an appetite hehe. Well this was my Dream in a Fitted! Leave it to me to dream up something like this!

Pet Peeve

This is an advise opportunity for my benefit LOL! I have a problem. You know how there is that one thing that somebody does that just gets soooo very deep into your skin that you can't tolerate it? That thing that you try to control but somebody else does not seem to understand? Well I have a few minor things that just seem to annoy me to the point of anger. The name I believe is called a pet peeve.

A pet peeve is a minor annoyance that extremely frustration a person. Typically each person has several pet peeves that aggravate him more than the average person. Another person may not react as negatively or at all to the same circumstance. Also, a pet peeve may seem illogical to others.

With that being said let me go through my pet peeves! Lets start from the worst and go to the least worst:

1. Repeating myself to people who don't pay attention
2. Other people chewing with their mouth open
3. Important Information that is conveniently left out until its inconvenient for me
4. Grown folks that have NO authority placing authority over my life
5. Hypocritical people who don't practice what they preach
6. People repeatedly telling me things I obviously know
   
7. Idle conversation about nothing that matters
   
8. People that DON'T listen to the rules
9. Cars that cut me off while I'm driving

I believe that I need some help! I have been working on number one since it will cause me to totally stop talking to you and get a serious attitude with you with the QUICKNESS! However, the 2nd through the 8th I have seen no progress. I've read that having these emotions are totally normal but I've recently experienced these emotions toward people that I have close relationships with.

I remember Star, from fm radio's Hot 97, said that she had a major issue with handwashing in public bathrooms! From flushing the Toilet all the way down to getting the towel from the towel dispenser LOL! She explained it and I completely understood. You are contaminated from the moment you wipe your booty or shake your dick! You touch everything from the time that happens until you leave the bathroom. So you're never really clean but you shake everybody's hand all day long! Kind of disgusting ain't it?

What types of pet peeves do other people have? Is it Normal to have mine? How do you deal with pet peeves? How can you try to stop letting the pet peeves effect your everyday life?

my last weekend

Where shall I start? Lets go to Friday. Some of you know that my current job forcefully switched my schedule and it was effective immediately. I would now be working on nights which opened up my mornings. I was offered a temporary week assignment in Wayne, NJ, for a kitchen position paying me $13/hr. I took that bad boy LOL. All last week I worked in Wayne from 6-3:30 or later, sit in like a hour traffic coming home, plan for this party I will mention in a lil while, and go to the second job from like 7:30-10 or 10:30. Friday was the last day of it all. My assignment ended on Friday then I went to a party kinda deal at a club to celebrate a friends birthday. Got a lil tipsy and swerved my way home LOL.

Saturday. The day of my Underwear Party. I was supposed to be out and done shopping by 1 and had some of the cooking started. But I woke up at 11:30am and left the house at 12:30pm! Choir rehearsal was at 2. I was late with everything! But everything went well. The party was a well function and It wasn't over till like 4am! Didn't think it would last that long...

Sunday. On the seventh day God rested and he observed what he had done. That's what I did with the exception of the whack meeting I went to at work at 8:30 in the morning. I went back to shawn's place and looked at the mess that I had made (wasn't much) and fell asleep. Woke up washed them up and fell asleep again. It was truly a day of rest!

Monday. The beginning of a new week that started pretty well. I have church all this week and I was truly moved by the service on last night. Evangelist Joyce Rogers, Chairlady of the youth of COGIC, spoke on "Having Something to Say". Standing up for what is right and NOT tolerating foolishness to make people happy. I'm sure that all this week there will be lots of high words to be said. I'm going to stay tuned for something that might apply to me!

Later Days!

Hey I'm Garfield!

What part animal are you?

You are part cat! You are very easily bored, and spend time aimlessly wandering. You enjoy attention more than most people, and have a very sensitive stomach (i.e. you don't like people poking your stomach). But everyone likes you, and they enjoy it when you're around.
Tell me why yesterday I found out that pluto is not a planet anymore? I was asked how many planets there was and I said 9 and then I was told that I was incorrect. So I looked it up and surely I was WRONG! Eh well... now everybody else knows...

Don't forget to check up on WHAT PISSES ME OFF and the weekend that my UNDERWEAR PARTY happened!

I'm Cyclops!

Which X-Men Character Are You??

CYCLOPS!!
Take this quiz!








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To, or not To?

I was in a conversation with a friend on last night and I was moved my something that was said. "At least you got the chance to know her very well." This statement was made in reference to the passing of my mother. It made me think of an old saying, Is it better to have loved and lost or to have never loved at all. I began to think on that and I didn't have an answer. I wanted to say loved and lost but I felt like saying never to have loved at all.

To be close to somebody and to lose them really hurts. I have lost many close family members and a few friends also. The first death was my god-sister, she died when I was 8, the day after my birthday. When it happens one right after the other, it seems to hurt more and last longer. I lost a friend in the beginning of high school, followed by my grandmother in 10th grade, then my designated 2nd grandmother on the same day the next year and another friend in the same year. Then a series of funerals came within 3 months just last year, which included my mother, and a few members of the church that I was close to.

This has left me paranoid and afraid to think who may go next. That resulting in me distancing myself other family and friends. Placing barriers on some people so they don't get too close. I don't know if this is a help or a hindrance. I guess I'll know when the next one dies. Its sad that I said that, nonetheless its how I feel!

There may be a possibility that there are unresolved emotions from my mother's passing. I thought that just letting them be or come out whenever they came out was how it was to be handled. Guess not... I'm now addressing the pain and the rest of the emotions that I have been having. Deciphering each feeling and why I feel that way. As a child I was motivated and encouraged by my mother mainly. Now, I haven't felt so motivated to do things and was wondering, why? This past Sunday, at a friends church, there was a concert that I attended. The final song was Encourage Yourself, by Donald Lawrence (Finale: Blessings of Abraham). I received so much from that song and was so moved that I started tearing. I'm telling you I'm going to be speaking over myself just in case all you "prayin" bloggers don't LOL.

I feel like stealing O's line, I'm in progression!

A day at the beach

Sometimes a day of fun is just what the Dr. ordered. I went to the beach on not this past Sunday but the Sunday before. It was great. The gang and I wanted to go to the clothing optional beach, but as we approached the entrance, the bridge broke, malfunctioned, whatever! So after going on a trip around the world, we decided to settle for any beach and that's what we did. Even though it wasn't the clothing optional beach we wanted, we still had loads of fun. Check me out:




That's Shawn doing what he does best (soupin ma head up making me look outstanding :-) Thanks) Here's a couple more...


At the end of the day we all had fun. Much laughter, playing, and eating at TGI Friday's. Oh I forgot, what's a group outing without a group shot?

Onward and forward to the next adventure. I wonder what the next post will be about. I guess we will see on the next post now won't we? Buh Bye!!!

Apologetic Extension

I'm sorry that I have not really been participating on blogger. I have felt awe about coming on here without Shawn. I know it sounds weird but true nonetheless. I just got into the blogworld and I'm still yet afraid of it. I had my training wheels (Shawn) on but they came off too soon. Or did they? I came online today and saw a comment on my recent post that touched me. It made me feel as though I have purpose, a meaning perhaps. I am affecting people and I didn't even know it!

I am getting an answer to a question that I did not know I had to ask. Starting this blog I was much in a state of confusion. I wanted to inquire about many things, seek answers to my life's troubles, and find solutions to them. I had no clue of what questions that I needed to be asking. As I wonder/ed to myself, and review past incidences and present occurrences, I am shown the questions I need to ask.

So I asked myself, just about 10 min ago, why end something that that is impacting others and myself! I didn't have an answer and it didn't sound sensible at the same time. I'd always have Shawn to voice his opinion to me in person, making me soar towards independency. Shawn will be my copilot, in case I need him :-)

Though I will miss him blogging, I must keep wondering...