Seems like this feeling is coming buy too frequently for my taste. It's leaving a nasty reminisce behind and I'm not feelin that at all. I'm kinda hoping that infatuation has be seeing something that's not there. I'm hoping that something is wrong that will reveal itself through time, and not a long time either. Do I sound a lil pessimistic? I'll answer that one, YUP! I'm over getting hopes up and building a fantasy future based on weak assumptions. I'm jaded by my recent run-ins and past dating experiences. I'm not trying to dive into anything holding my heart in front of me. Nahhh, I'm done with that. I'll be on guard. I'll be watching for every lil thing that might eliminate you. I'm not goin thru another cycle of cryin on the futon, sittin in the dark beat over some guy that I wanted to give my all to.
Some of you might be saying, "didn't he just say that he isn't going to be lookin for relationships anymore?" Yea I did just get finished saying that. Also, with my dealings, whenever I give up hope of happiness, it comes along and smacks me in my face. I have no clue why destiny likes to play cruel jokes on me, but I stopped trying to figure out my destiny in some aspects and said I'm just gonna let it ride. I'll take what seems nice and go from there.
Enter the lawyer... This has so many X's on it its not even funny! I'm open to seeing where it might go. I like his drive and his personality. When I gave him a bio of myself, there was a silence on the line. "hello... are you there?" Y'all know that T-Mobile service is horrible! I was checking to make sure I was still on the call, lol. He was there. I asked him what the silence was about and he stated that you sound like the perfect dude for me. I don't especially like when people call me perfect for them. It makes me think they are desperate or very clingy or something. I made a mental note and kept the convo moving. In another convo, he gave me his brief bio and ironically enough, I was feelin the exact same way. I thought to myself, this is too good to be true. I been here before and seen this gift before. It stings, Its a rude and bland joke that leaves me on the side of the road wondering why I even bothered.
My experiences tell me to move on. My open mind tells me to give him a chance and not to judge him by mistakes made by others and you with others. I feel like I'm about to be taken for a mean roller coaster ride and I'm not going to enjoy the trip. Usually with roller coasters, despite how off it may look, you still gonna get on. Intrigue gets you on the line. Excitement puts you in the seat. Interest keeps you riding. I think I'm about to get on line. Here we go!
Just Keep Wondering...
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