Returning to Normalcy

The dictionary tells me that normalcy is being within certain limits that define the range of normal functioning. I had to really ponder what was normal for me. Normal for me was having a job and having sufficient funds to live and comfortably, enjoying life. Normal for me was looking forward for tomorrow, not for tasks and errands to be completed, but to enjoying life, smiling, laughing, enjoying the company of others and more. I hated my previous state of existing. It's not a bad state of existing, but one that I didn't care for. I would wake up and just want to back to sleep. I would get paid and feel like the paycheck wasn't worth my worth the time and energy put into it. I would go to sleep not wanting to do it again. and a few other things too.

Right about now, I feel my worth in my paycheck. I'm in a state of being that I can openly say I am well in. There aren't many things I can call my own, but the few things I can, I'm happy with. I've lost alot within the past year (car, license, furniture, clothes, apartment, friends, and a portion of my happiness). Some of which I am gaining back. I just got an apartment, I'm rebuilding my wardrobe slowly, one piece at a time and I'm growing closer to the friends I did keep, or should i say the ones that kept me. Most got an ultimatum. I am going to a certain place and I have a certain goal. If you can't align yourself or at least be a decent sidebar while I attain my goal, you're a hindrance and your presance isn't welcome around me. Many chose to dip off while others chose to stay. No hard feelings but I can't go back to where I was. Only building upward and going onward. ascending to new plateaus and grabbing onto higher levels.

Just today, I decided to go purchase a bluetooth earpiece. Couldn't do that unless I had the spare change to do so. So, it was a decent checkpoint for me. I'm looking forward to more moments of liesure.

Normalcy is returning to me. I'm happier. I'm one more stepp closer towards independance.